Response to Bullying:

Tonight, as I read through numerous blogs on the topic of bullying, I finally found a very deep and significant quote by Francis!

"After I had experienced this hate, I finally realized what I had done was wrong. Now I am not going to lie, I still try to get into the popular group and I also still trivialize others, but to a lesser extent. I believe that the true reason why people bully others and impugn other’s existence is to escape getting hurt themselves or to escape their own thoughts of self inferiority."

Everyone has wrote on this topic with there very own experiences. Bullying can be explained in so many ways and to so many extents, making it more difficult to make sense of the reason for bullying.  It is so hard to get to the roots of this brutal activity. In this quote, Francis gives one of the answers to bullying, (I really like the clear specific vocabulary he uses!) He explains it as a need to escape, which applies to both the bully and the victim. Victims want to be left alone and be treated fairly; to escape the criticism targeted upon them. However tough a bully presents himself or herself to be, there is at least a tiny bit of intention to escape becoming the target. Francis says, "to escape their own thoughts of self inferiority"; this part of the quote contain a lot of meaning to how bullies feel. (Note that bullies are not all arrogant people. I think everyone  lacks a good sense of judgment once in a while.) Guilt is the biggest punishment towards bullies, and in the end it strikes them hard. Guilt can bring you down and you start feeling lower than the victim you picked on. When bullies start to realize the harm they have done, sometimes they try to ignore it. The awareness of being responsible casts a big shadow, and that is what bullies try to escape.

One rule of the ASTI Constitution relates closely to the relationship between bully and victim I described, it is this:
Take responsibilities for your actions and words.
From Francis's quote, I realized that bullies are responsible for a bit of mental punishment - called, guilt.

#13 'Just Kidding' and 'Ganging Up' from Odd Girl Out By Rachael Simmons Reflection

            Bullying can take many forms and surprisingly, this act of aggression differs in gender. Boys show their aggression clearly and directly, while girls hide their emotions in the form of jokes. This article asserts that the reason for this difference is the culture. Girls acknowledge that they cannot show aggression openly, and especially cannot show it alone. Therefore, their jokes actually show their true feelings and they usually have many friends who support them. Many girls are either guilty of bullying for the sake of popularity or are bullied and secluded while loosing friends, maybe even both. I was a victim of bullying by about two or three people. Even though they were not big dramas, it still felt as discouraging. I have also taken part in bullying by making jokes about people who seemed "wierd" to me. I later stopped when I realized that I had seriously hurt the people's feelings and it would not be funny if it was me. When being bullied with jokes, I try to figure out if they are really jokes or not and I wonder if I am taking it too seriously. I have also experienced people who are very straightforward with rude remarks. The first times I encountered people like that I did not know what to say, but overtime I learned how to deal with those kind of people. I also consider if the person meant it in a harmful way or not, because some people do not think when they joke or they may mean it lightly. However, when people bully using jokes it is mostly obvious because of the tone of voice they use. People say bullies want to be loved. In order to raise their own self-esteem, they have to lower others'. I think bullies may be treated the same way elsewhere, where they are accustomed to that kind of attitude and then learned to use it towards others.

            There are many reasons for bullies to want to hurt others, including staying popular, and raising self-esteem. Many dramas start with people judging each other when they know barely anything about one another. It is hard not to judge people, but we should keep an open-mind to different people. Often, we do not know enough background on the person, and even if we do, we should make fair judgments. We may not be compatible with everybody, but we do not have to be outrageously nasty towards them.