Yo's Identity

In the book, How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents, by Julia Alvarez, the four sisters, Sandra, Carla, Yolanda, and Sofia were all affected by the immigration from the Dominican Republic to America. The themes, sexuality and culture, repeatedly appear in the book as they deal with problems in their lives. Yolanda’s experience with sexuality and the languages in both cultures led her towards a mental breakdown in her adulthood. As poetry is a huge factor in Yolanda’s life, her talent in poetry and her involvements in romantic relationships both impact each other in negative ways, resulting in the downfall of both.

As a child, Yolanda used poetry as a way to express herself. At a very young age, she and her mother often recited poems together. She began by writing poetry and became so involved and appreciated by her teachers that she was often asked to read her poetry in class or in poetry readings. It began in college, when she was set free from her over-protective parents that she was exposed to sex. In an English class of Americans, Yo was introduced to both her first love, Rudy Elmenhurst, and to a deeper analysis of the art of poetry. As they emerged into a closer relationship, Rudy taught Yo about love and poetry as one. Yo admitted, “It was the first pornographic poem I’d ever co-written; of course I didn’t know it was pornographic until Rudy explained to me all the word plays and double meanings” (93). In the beginning, Yo seems to admire Rudy’s ability with words and poetry, as well as his knowledge about sex. Her first knowledge about sex is from a classmate that is described as a bad boy, in the form of poetry. Rudy manipulates her love for poetry to get into a closer relationship. Poetry and romantic relationships becomes intertwined.

As their relationships continued, Yo sensed that their relationship was slowly decreasing less into poetry and more into lovemaking. Rudy exposed a whole new world of drugs, parties, and sex into her life. He began urging her to have sex with him. She continuously refused, afraid of becoming pregnant. He began more vulgar and impatient with her lack of knowledge and her refusal. Yo realized Rudy’s true intention during their last argument in college. He says to her heartlessly, “I thought you’d be hot-blooded, being Spanish and all, and that under all that Catholic bullshit, you’d be really free, instead of all hung up like these cotillion chicks from prep schools. But Jesus, you’re worse than a fucking Puritan” (99). As Yo was attracted to Rudy’s poetic words in the beginning of their relationship, she becomes less attracted when he uses foul languages towards her. He expresses selfishness, not even trying to understand Yo’s feelings. He barely makes an effort to comfort her appropriately. Rudy brings up her ethnicity and the stereotypes towards her race. Yo, as a foreigner in this country, feels that he cannot relate to her culture, her religious beliefs, and most importantly to her use of language. This realization filled her with self-doubts and insecurity.

In adulthood, Yo experiences a confusing marriage with her husband, John. Yo has become quite involved in language and she likes to rhyme. In a flirtatious setting, Yolanda introduces to John a game of rhyme; where what they say to each other have to rhyme with each other’s or their own names. Yo tells John that she wants to be sky, and then John points out that sky does not rhyme with Joe. Yo thinks silently, “’Yo rhymes with cielo in Spanish.’ Yo’s words fell into the dark, mute cavern of John’s mouth. Cielo, cielo, the word echoed. And Yo was running, like the mad, into the safety of her first tongue, where the proudly monolingual John could not catch her, even if he tried” (72). In the beginning of the relationship, nothing unpleasant has happened, but she feels a kind of misunderstanding between them. The poetic side of her comes in between their relationship. To John, the kiss is a sign of affection and love. But in this metaphor, Yo feels as if John is silencing her words. John’s mouth serves as a hollow hole; he does not understand Yo, especially her language split between Spanish and English because Yo emphasizes John as a “proud monolingual”, trying to catch her. As foreseen by Yo’s first sense of discomfort, their relationship did not bond as time passed.

At the end of Yo’s relationship with John, she finds her psychiatrist, Dr. Paine, to help her. She could no longer understand John; she hears his words as “babble”. She has become allergic to certain personal words in her life. She cannot form her own language, and can only quote and misquote others. Her mother comforts her, “’Ay, Yolanda.’ Her mother pronounced her name in Spanish, her pure, mouth-filling, full blooded name, Yolanda. But then it was inevitable, like gravity, like night and day, little apple bites when God’s back is turned, her name fell, bastardized, breaking into a half dozen nicknames” (81). The biggest problem with their relationship is that Yo felt that her own identity was chipping away. In their relationship, John often teases her, giving her nicknames like Valentine and Violet. She was not able to find herself in the many nicknames. John reconstructed her identity with these nicknames, but her true identity involves her poetic self and Spanish heritage that John did not fully accept. Her inability to understand John in the end symbolized the breakdown of the connection with words.

Through Yo’s struggle with relationship and language, she eventually did not become a poet. Doubting her poetic language led her to mistrust herself. She lost touch between her loved ones and most importantly, herself and her poetic abilities. Ultimately, Yolanda’s Spanish heritage, her American culture, and the combination of both in her poetic language symbolize her identity.